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Troll Hunting in New Jersey

April 13, 2025

So my little break from blogging turned into a longer-than-expected hiatus of five and a half years. Oh well. Better late than never! But before I get back into the types of content you’ve come to expect from me, like my intriguing personal memoirs, award-winning investigative journalism, in-depth interviews, and expert political commentary, let’s start with something quick and fun…

…like meeting Big Rusty!

Located off of some unmarked dirt road in Burlington County, Big Rusty is best described as true Jersey trash. I mean, he’s literally made from trash. And he’s perched against a decaying old warehouse covered in graffiti and full of broken glass, exposed wires, and God knows what else.

Big Rusty is part of Burlington County’s Troll Trek – a series of 18 trolls around the county made by different artists. While all the trolls have distinct names and personalities, Big Rusty is the only one of such large scale; this guy is huge.

While we took the kids to see Big Rusty, I can’t say it’s exactly kid-friendly. Sure, Big Rusty is an attraction himself, but you can’t help but want to explore the decrepit buildings surrounding him. And with the aforementioned broken glass and such, it seems like an accident waiting to happen. Even without kids, it’s a little shady – just one wrong step and you could end up with a puncture wound and tetanus.

But despite feeling like a junkyard, I was surprised at how clean it is in some ways. I didn’t see a single cigarette butt, crushed beer can, or little bottle of Fireball like you’d expect at other such locations in the Armpit of America. Being so far off the beaten path, Big Rusty’s home seems like the perfect place for the kind of wild teenage shenanigans that I was never cool enough to participate in. So either teens these days are much more environmentally conscious and clean up after themselves, or maybe Big Rusty doesn’t take kindly to intruders.

Categories: Armpit Adventures, NJ Personalities
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I Stayed in a Creepy Cabin in the Pine Barrens

October 27, 2019

The Pine Barrens cover a large swath of South Jersey and are home to lots of pine trees, pineys (the locals), and some unique wildlife found nowhere else in the Armpit of America. It’s also the stomping grounds of the Jersey Devil – the one of mythological fame, not Chris Christie (anyone remember him?). And there are several creepy cabins you can rent there, too!

So against better judgement, we decided to rent one of these cabins with no TV, no heat, and barest of bones furnishings with an almost-three-year-old. While it was nice to get away from it all, it was pretty damn creepy. Even the drive to get there, passing several trailer parks filled with the aforementioned pineys on dusty, desolate roads was unsettling.

road to cabin

But the creepy factor really set it once we got to what was described as a charming, rustic cabin. I mean look at this thing. Is that not straight out of every horror movie that takes place in a cabin?

Cabin front

(more…)

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Exploring the Urban Nature of North Jersey

April 29, 2017

Think of the biggest stereotypes of New Jersey – overcrowding, factories spewing out pollution, a mess of traffic-choked highways, garbage dumps, etc. While this is what most of the world thinks about the Armpit of America, it is totally wrong – except when it comes to the northeastern corner of the state. I’m exaggerating of course, but the area of New Jersey across from New York City isn’t exactly the first place that comes to mind when you want to spend the day in nature. But you’d be totally wrong for thinking that.

I recently explored Richard W. DeKorte Park, right in the middle of the New Jersey’s Meadowlands – an area now more famous for its sports and entertainment venues rather than the wetlands for which it was named. Now I would say that the park provides a nice escape from all of the New Jerseyishness of being in New Jersey, but it’s all still there, just pushed into the background. And somehow, despite having all the highways, factories, powerlines, and buildings in view and all the associated noise within earshot, it just adds to the experience rather than detracting from it.

 

meadowlands 1

The park consists of multiple walking bridges built right over the wetlands, allowing you to see fish swimming around the water and birds flying all around. But it’s not just the birds flying overhead – you’ll see countless planes making their way to or from Newark Airport. And amid the rustling of the tall grasses, you’ll hear the whistle of the train coming by.  Moreover, the whole scene is framed by New Jersey’s endless network of highways. Not sure why, but it all makes sense.

meadowlands 2

 

Maybe that’s because the area has always been impacted by humans, and nature has always had to adapt. Wikipedia tells me that before the Meadowlands were actually made up of their namesake meadowlands, it was full of cedar forests, which the early Dutch settlers cleared away to grow salt hay. And since then, the area has been treated as a garbage dump by every group of people who passed through.

Still, Mother Nature persisted. The result is an urban yet natural landscape that can only be found in New Jersey.

Categories: Armpit Adventures, Uncategorized

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A Tour of the “Jersey Shore” House!

July 4, 2016

This is pretty epic. If you couldn’t tell from the title, I went on a tour of the “Jersey Shore” house, and it was amazing! Considering how much I’ve written about this show and its crazy cast of greasy goofballs, I can honestly say this was one of the highlights of my life.

It wasn’t planned or expected – just happened to be in Seaside Heights, walked up to the infamous Shore Store where the cast worked during the show, and saw a sign inviting people to take a tour of the house, which is right behind it. Of course, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to see where our beloved Snooki, The Situation, J-WOWW, and the rest of the gang lived, fought, hooked up (and God knows what else they did in that house) for four summers.

IMG_2378

They’d probably get more business if they advertised: “Take a picture in the Smush Room”

The tour was led by this guy who worked on the crew of the show, who led us through the back door of the Shore Store and onto the back porch. But before we went inside, he warned us that it’s a lot smaller in real life – something I’m sure many of the girls who’ve hooked up with The Situation have also realized. (more…)

Categories: Armpit Adventures, MTV's "Jersey Shore"
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Let’s Talk About Vintage Arcade Games…Again!

June 25, 2016

There’s just something about old timey video games that keeps drawing me in (and keeps me writing about them – like this time and this other time). Though I satiate this need by plugging in the old, yellowed Super Nintendo and playing Super Mario World for the millionth time (and still being unable to do that crazy jump in the Cheese Bridge level that opens the path to Soda Lake) or a newly acquired Intellivision, these aren’t always enough.

Thankfully, there are a growing number of arcades serving the not so niche market of vintage electronic entertainment seekers. One such place is the Silverball Museum in Asbury Park, which despite sounding like a gallery dedicated to geriatric genitals, is fortunately nothing of the sort. Having heard about this place for years, I finally checked it out during a recent all-too-rare visit to my beloved Jersey Shore and was blown away – you walk in and see row after row of about 100 pinball games all lovingly cared for and in perfect working condition. And each one has a sign above it giving you the year the machine was made and a brief back story.

And what’s great about the place is that you pay a flat hourly (or half hourly) fee up front, and then have access to every single machine, all of which have been retrofitted with a start button instead of having to feed them quarters. That’s right – no more having to deal with that stupid change machine that keeps spitting your dollar out, or having to keep fishing into your weighted down pocket to get a new quarter when you lose. Although I’m sure some would argue that that’s part of the experience of being at an arcade. (more…)

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