Posted tagged ‘New Jersey’

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You Know You’re in NJ When…

November 16, 2010

You know you’re in New Jersey when you’re driving around and you see something like this:

That’s right, a pork roll van.  The incident happened a couple days ago.  I was driving on Route 35 and all of the sudden, I realized I was behind a van advertising pork roll.  So I stalked the van until we were stopped at a red light and took the picture.

For those who don’t know, pork roll is the official processed meat of New Jersey and one-third of the famous pork roll, egg, and cheese sandwich that this state is famous for.  Despite the advertisement, the website theporkrollstore.com is nonexistent.  But a quick search tells me that the real Pork Roll Store is located in Allentown, NJ.  I’ve always heard about a store in Allentown that has the best pork roll – I guess that must be the place.  Anyway, where else can you be driving down the street and see a van advertising salty processed pig?  Only in the Armpit of America.

For more information about this true mystery meat, go here.

Categories: Driving in New Jersey, Food
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Comments: 2 Comments

Welcome to Summer in New Jersey

June 30, 2010

I think it is safe to say that New Jersey does summer better than any other state.  Go anywhere south of the Mason-Dixon line, and you’ll sweat your ass off.  Go to any other state in the Northeast, and you’ll be bored out of your mind.  Go to one of those bland Great Lakes states, and you’ll be covered in mosquitoes.  Go out west, and you’ll find states even more boring than you thought possible.

Sure, we get an influx of trashy New Yorkers here each summer, but I like to think of them and their antics as free entertainment.  Seriously, who didn’t love watching “Jersey Shore”?  And with the new season of that train wreck of a show fast approaching, people all over the world will once again see what makes summer in New Jersey so special.

One of the highlights of summer in New Jersey is the plethora of festivals at the shore and throughout the rest of the state.  Having recently gone to two of these festivals, both of which were packed full of rowdy, obnoxious people, I’m happy to say that summer in New Jersey is in full swing.

The first festival I went to was the Belmar Seafood festival, which serves all types of marine animals.  While it didn’t serve any whales, there were plenty to be found on the premises.  Anyway, as I’m not much of a seafood fan, and I was saving my appetite for another festival that night, we just got that carnival favorite known as butterfly fries.

I see Idaho hasn't taken my advice to get some new material...

So what kind of festival could be so important that I would cast aside coconut shrimp and crab cakes?  A Greek festival of course.  Who needs deep-fried bottom-dwelling shellfish, when you can have moussaka and pastitsio lovingly handmade by sweet, old Greek ladies? (more…)

Categories: Armpit Adventures, Food, Jersey Shore
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Comments: 2 Comments

New Poll Shows What We Already Know

June 20, 2010

In what should be a surprise to absolutely no one, people hate living in New Jersey. According to a new Quinnipiac survey, 75% of residents of the Armpit of America are unhappy with life in the state. And how many of us Jersey residents are happy here? A mere 2%.

After reading about this survey, I was pretty shocked. Not by the results, obviously. Rather, I was surprised that the folks over at Quinnipiac actually spent the time and effort to find out what the whole world already knows. Then again, as the Quinnipiac survey is located in Connecticut, I suppose the staffers were tired of sitting in their mansions and counting money and decided to make a less fortunate state feel worse about itself.

The survey wasn’t just about whether New Jerseyans are satisfied with the state or not. Participants were also asked about their opinions of our shady governor, the redundantly named Chris Christie. Apparently, but not surprisingly, the majority of the state disagrees with Christie’s policies. Of course, who would agree with his plans to drastically cut funding for public schools, shut down state-run mental hospitals, and lay-off a bunch of state employees? A vast majority also disagrees with his decision to veto the state legislature’s “millionaire’s tax,” which would result in a whole lot of much needed money for the state.

So why exactly is Christie doing all of these things that go against what his constituents want? It’s pretty clear to me. Less money for education means a dumber population. Shutting down psychiatric hospitals means more crazy people on the loose. No millionaire’s tax means all the rich people in the state will love him. And with more uneducated and crazy people in the state, and a bunch of satisfied millionaires, Chris Christie is clearly building a coalition to ensure reelection to a second term in three years.

As he gets to do whatever he wants as governor, I’m sure Chris Christie is a pretty happy guy. Too bad his happiness comes at the expense of the very people he’s in charge of governing.

Categories: politics
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More Stuff

June 8, 2010

Well I’m back from vacation.  After spending a week in California, it’s great to be back in the Armpit of America.    Now that I’m back, you can expect me to post more regularly.  And you can expect a couple entries comparing New Jersey to that state on the west coast in the near future.  Who needs California and its beautiful scenery, laid back atmosphere, and readily available medical marijuana anyway?

Now onto some other stuff.  About two weeks ago, I got an e-mail from someone at a PR company.  She told me that her company is launching a new website and a campaign aimed at defending New Jersey from all the bullying it falls victim to.  The name of the campaign?  “Jersey Doesn’t Stink.”  Naturally, I assumed this was all a joke.  Who in their right mind would spend the time to create  a website defending the Armpit of America (aside from me, of course).

Well, I was just notified that the site has launched and it is indeed real.  It contains a petition to stand up for our little state.  There’s also a hilarious video in which this guy walks around New York City asking people how they feel about New Jersey.  So if you love New Jersey as much as I do, then go check out Jersey Doesn’t Stink and join their fight.

Categories: Personal, Random
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Comments: 1 Comment

Stuff

May 29, 2010

I meant to put up a new entry this week, but that didn’t pan out.  Instead, you can read my entry on the Jersey City pimp again!  Unfortunately, I won’t be able to update for another week, as I’m going on a much needed vacation today.  (However, there is a chance a guest blogger will post a new entry; stay tuned.)

Anyway, I’ll be heading out of state (shocking, I know).  But as much as I love New Jersey, it’s good to get away every now and then.  Although, whenever I’m in another state, I come appreciate the Armpit of America even more.  What makes California so special anyway, compared to New Jersey?  Well you can find out with a new State vs. State entry at some point after my return.

Now for some more self-promotion!  If you like what you read here, you can subscribe to this blog by putting your e-mail address in the box to the right.  As soon as I post new entries, you can read them in right in your e-mail.  Also, you can follow me on Twitter @armpitnj and visit my YouTube channel.

Well that’s it for today.  We’re about to head out on the Turnpike to go to Newark Liberty Airport.  Wish me luck – I’ll need it.

Categories: Personal
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