Welcome to Summer in New Jersey

Posted June 30, 2010 by armpitnj
Categories: Armpit Adventures, Food, Jersey Shore
Tags: , , , , , ,

I think it is safe to say that New Jersey does summer better than any other state.  Go anywhere south of the Mason-Dixon line, and you’ll sweat your ass off.  Go to any other state in the Northeast, and you’ll be bored out of your mind.  Go to one of those bland Great Lakes states, and you’ll be covered in mosquitoes.  Go out west, and you’ll find states even more boring than you thought possible.

Sure, we get an influx of trashy New Yorkers here each summer, but I like to think of them and their antics as free entertainment.  Seriously, who didn’t love watching “Jersey Shore”?  And with the new season of that train wreck of a show fast approaching, people all over the world will once again see what makes summer in New Jersey so special.

One of the highlights of summer in New Jersey is the plethora of festivals at the shore and throughout the rest of the state.  Having recently gone to two of these festivals, both of which were packed full of rowdy, obnoxious people, I’m happy to say that summer in New Jersey is in full swing.

The first festival I went to was the Belmar Seafood festival, which serves all types of marine animals.  While it didn’t serve any whales, there were plenty to be found on the premises.  Anyway, as I’m not much of a seafood fan, and I was saving my appetite for another festival that night, we just got that carnival favorite known as butterfly fries.

I see Idaho hasn't taken my advice to get some new material...

So what kind of festival could be so important that I would cast aside coconut shrimp and crab cakes?  A Greek festival of course.  Who needs deep-fried bottom-dwelling shellfish, when you can have moussaka and pastitsio lovingly handmade by sweet, old Greek ladies? Read the rest of this post »

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New Poll Shows What We Already Know

Posted June 20, 2010 by armpitnj
Categories: politics
Tags: , , ,

In what should be a surprise to absolutely no one, people hate living in New Jersey. According to a new Quinnipiac survey, 75% of residents of the Armpit of America are unhappy with life in the state. And how many of us Jersey residents are happy here? A mere 2%.

After reading about this survey, I was pretty shocked. Not by the results, obviously. Rather, I was surprised that the folks over at Quinnipiac actually spent the time and effort to find out what the whole world already knows. Then again, as the Quinnipiac survey is located in Connecticut, I suppose the staffers were tired of sitting in their mansions and counting money and decided to make a less fortunate state feel worse about itself.

The survey wasn’t just about whether New Jerseyans are satisfied with the state or not. Participants were also asked about their opinions of our shady governor, the redundantly named Chris Christie. Apparently, but not surprisingly, the majority of the state disagrees with Christie’s policies. Of course, who would agree with his plans to drastically cut funding for public schools, shut down state-run mental hospitals, and lay-off a bunch of state employees? A vast majority also disagrees with his decision to veto the state legislature’s “millionaire’s tax,” which would result in a whole lot of much needed money for the state.

So why exactly is Christie doing all of these things that go against what his constituents want? It’s pretty clear to me. Less money for education means a dumber population. Shutting down psychiatric hospitals means more crazy people on the loose. No millionaire’s tax means all the rich people in the state will love him. And with more uneducated and crazy people in the state, and a bunch of satisfied millionaires, Chris Christie is clearly building a coalition to ensure reelection to a second term in three years.

As he gets to do whatever he wants as governor, I’m sure Chris Christie is a pretty happy guy. Too bad his happiness comes at the expense of the very people he’s in charge of governing.

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Bar A is A-Okay!

Posted June 14, 2010 by armpitnj
Categories: Bars, Jersey Shore
Tags: , , , , ,

Anyone who actually calls it that = obvious benny

Bar A, short for the formal and kinda stupid name of Bar Anticipation, is perhaps the most famous bar in New Jersey. Found in Lake Como, formerly known as South Belmar, Bar A serves as a rite of passage for anyone growing up in New Jersey and, unfortunately, those from New York as well.

For those who have never been, let me explain the appeal of this place. First of all, the bar is HUGE. Between a cavernous interior with a large and always packed (with guidos) dance floor and a sprawling outdoor section, Bar A has a spot for everyone. If you get tired of being in the cramped and loud indoor part, you can make your way outside and find a quiet place to sit down. Oh, and there are probably at least 20 different bar counters, so you never have to wait long for a drink.  It is definately the kind of place you’d wanna spend a hot, sticky New Jersey night.

Despite the above things going for it, and the hundreds of people who crowd into the bar each weekend, Bar A is still reviled by many people. Sure, they complain about the $10 cover charge (which is understandable) and the costs of the drinks (which can be a tad on the more expensive side). On top of that, people often take issue with the clientele. Sure, the bar gets its share of guidos, cougars, and thugs, but that just shows how Bar A is welcoming to all groups of people.  Just keep your distance from whichever group you’re not a part of.  Unless, of course, you’re trying to get with a guido, cougar, or thug.

This past weekend, I organized an outing to Bar A. One friend was dead set on not going, saying that she had never been there and never would go. Apparently, the threat of encountering any guidos was a little too much. I tried to explain how every group keeps to itself and that I’ve never seen a single fight or skirmish. Maybe that’s just because people don’t want to get thrown out after paying the cover charge. Or maybe it’s because Bar A is such a magical place where people of all backgrounds can get along. Or maybe I just don’t go there enough. Read the rest of this post »

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More Stuff

Posted June 8, 2010 by armpitnj
Categories: Personal, Random
Tags: , ,

Well I’m back from vacation.  After spending a week in California, it’s great to be back in the Armpit of America.    Now that I’m back, you can expect me to post more regularly.  And you can expect a couple entries comparing New Jersey to that state on the west coast in the near future.  Who needs California and its beautiful scenery, laid back atmosphere, and readily available medical marijuana anyway?

Now onto some other stuff.  About two weeks ago, I got an e-mail from someone at a PR company.  She told me that her company is launching a new website and a campaign aimed at defending New Jersey from all the bullying it falls victim to.  The name of the campaign?  “Jersey Doesn’t Stink.”  Naturally, I assumed this was all a joke.  Who in their right mind would spend the time to create  a website defending the Armpit of America (aside from me, of course).

Well, I was just notified that the site has launched and it is indeed real.  It contains a petition to stand up for our little state.  There’s also a hilarious video in which this guy walks around New York City asking people how they feel about New Jersey.  So if you love New Jersey as much as I do, then go check out Jersey Doesn’t Stink and join their fight.

Comments: 1 Comment

Stuff

Posted May 29, 2010 by armpitnj
Categories: Personal
Tags: , ,

I meant to put up a new entry this week, but that didn’t pan out.  Instead, you can read my entry on the Jersey City pimp again!  Unfortunately, I won’t be able to update for another week, as I’m going on a much needed vacation today.  (However, there is a chance a guest blogger will post a new entry; stay tuned.)

Anyway, I’ll be heading out of state (shocking, I know).  But as much as I love New Jersey, it’s good to get away every now and then.  Although, whenever I’m in another state, I come appreciate the Armpit of America even more.  What makes California so special anyway, compared to New Jersey?  Well you can find out with a new State vs. State entry at some point after my return.

Now for some more self-promotion!  If you like what you read here, you can subscribe to this blog by putting your e-mail address in the box to the right.  As soon as I post new entries, you can read them in right in your e-mail.  Also, you can follow me on Twitter @armpitnj and visit my YouTube channel.

Well that’s it for today.  We’re about to head out on the Turnpike to go to Newark Liberty Airport.  Wish me luck – I’ll need it.

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